~*~*~*~
APOV:
Charlotte was a Godsend. Truly, she was. She got Rosalie’s and my gown, plus the alterations to Bella’s dress done on time. Jonathan, despite my doubts, showed up early to do our hair and made each of us look beautiful. Bella, however, looked radiant. I could tell she was nervous about the wedding, about how she looked, about… well, everything. So I did my best to calm her down while the guys took care of getting everyone seated and doing all the menial tasks.
I still hadn’t really seen Jasper since the first day, and really… I don’t think I wanted to. Especially not after accepting my proposal from Garrett, getting rip-roaring drunk with Bella and spilling the beans about Jasper’s and my sordid history. She couldn’t believe all the little kinks Jasper had, agreeing with me that it was always the quiet ones. I felt a little guilty about telling her, but I knew she’d never tell a soul and honestly, it felt great to finally tell someone.
Now, disturbed by this knowledge, I would say something and Bella would instantly look at me and giggle like mad. That was until we played one of Rosalie’s games of truth or dare at the bachelorette party last night. Now it was me and Rosalie who got to look at Bella and snicker. Girl is way too truthful when she’s drunk.
We got ourselves situated and the wedding began- big shocker here- on time. Rosalie walked out first, gliding sweetly towards the pastor and her place. Then it was my turn; step, together, step, I thought as I walked with my eyes directed ahead.
Don’t look at him,I chanted repeatedly in my mind. Which worked great until Garrett caught my attention and I smiled at his beaming face. I knew he would think I was really beautiful all done up like this. Then when I turned my eyes back ahead of me, I saw him.
Oh my, Jasper, he looks really good.
Haircut, not too short, but short enough to deal with the crazy ass hippie hair he had going on, check, the slightest hint of scruff, check, a fucking pressed three-piece-suit, fucking check. I lifted my eyes back up his hard lean body dressed to the nines in black back to his beautiful steel colored eyes, only to see the expression on his face. He was looking at me, the left corner of his mouth turned up slightly and his eyes filled with adoration. I swallowed hard. Jesus Alice, get a hold of yourself. You’re engaged and Jasper didn’t want you, remember?
I steadied my nerves and turned my eyes back to my brother, who was smirking at me. I smirked a little back at him as I made my way up the two stairs to stand in front of Rosalie, turning to look back at Bella just as she entered.
I smiled at my best friend as Charlie walked her down the aisle, she looked anxious to get to my brother, a wide grin crossing her face. I glanced over at Garrett. He looked so handsome, and he was smiling just like everyone else had been. I saw him shift his eyes to me and grin, I, of course, grinned back.
Charlie gave his blessings on the union and then took his seat with Renee and Phil, Bella and Emmett’s step dad. They looked overjoyed, Renee hiding her grin behind a tissue. Those of us in the wedding party turned so that we were looking at the bride and groom and I locked eyes with Jasper, he looked stunned before I dropped my head slightly so I wouldn‘t meet his eyes again.
The ceremony continued on, I listened distractedly as my brother and my best friend said their vows. I was so happy for them I felt like I might burst, but then again, some little part of me ached too. I tried desperately not to let that part of me come out. It had to stay hidden. It was better for everyone if that part of me stayed hidden.
However, it was hard to hide as long as he continued to stare at me. I could feel his eyes, watching my every move. It was both flattering and uncomfortable. One side was elated Jasper's giving me his attention again, while the other side was worried about what Garrett would think.
I took deep breaths as I willed this torture to end, listening as they exchanged rings and after a long passage was read, kissed. I clapped happily for my brother and new sister-in-law, whistling as they kissed each other passionately.
They began the procession and I walked with my eyes downcast towards Jasper. He held out his arm for me and we walked together behind Edward and Bella towards the double doors as everyone around us stood and waited for us. I didn’t even look at Garrett as we passed him, afraid of the look that would be on his face.
I continued to walk with Jasper, feeling like it was the most natural thing in the world. As we exited the chapel, Jasper shifted himself to place his hand gently on my lower back with one hand and grab the swinging door with the other. “You look b-b-beautiful,” he stuttered out quietly as he did so.
I looked up at him finally, his grey eyes shining with… hope? I cocked my head to the side and studied him for a minute. “Thank you,” I whispered.
“No need to thank me Ali Cat, I'm just stating the facts.” He gave me a small smile.
I gave him a nod, “Well, thank you for stating them. Even if…” I stopped myself and shook my head of any questions I had for him, “never mind”
He leaned closer to me, a spicy citrus scent wafted gently in my direction. “Never let anyone tell you otherwise Alice.”
I looked deep into those grey eyes of his, “I’ve changed a lot Jasper.” He raised an eyebrow, but gave me no indication that he intended to speak further. I looked away from him, if he really thought I was so beautiful, he wouldn’t have left me.
“We all change, Alice. Some of us even change for the better. Just believe me when I say you're beautiful, okay?” he told me. I looked back up at him, to see him glaring at me, frozen in spot. You don’t want to start a fight here Alice.
“Sissy!” A whirl of brown, cream and white hugged me so hard; the force nearly knocked me on my ass.
She pulled back and I grinned at her enthusiasm. “You are a dork. Just so you know.”
She grinned right back, “Yes I am. Oh my God, I'm married!” She gave a small squeal of excitement.
“Congrats Bella,” Jasper nodded politely in my new sister-in-laws direction before heading over to where his friends were, a few feet away.
“Congrats Honey Bee!”
“Thanks Ali!” I smiled uneasily at Jasper’s back.
Bella tilted her head, “What did he do Alz?”
“He said I look beautiful and should never let anyone tell me differently.” I whispered.
She gave me a big hug before whispering in my ear, “Well he's right. You are.”
“If I'm so beautiful then why the fuck did he leave me?” I hissed, unable to hold it in any longer.
“I don't think it was your beauty that made him leave Alz! He was a messed up kid from what Ed and Em told me. And if you want answers you’ll have to take it up with him. He's really the only one who can tell you what he was thinking that day.”
I shook my head, embarrassed at my actions on my best friend’s wedding day. “No, I'm sorry Bells,” I sighed. “It's too late; we've both moved on, it won't do anything if I ask. It won't change anything.”
She raised an eyebrow at me, “Who are you and what have you done with my sister?”
“I'm a grown woman,” I smirked, “Sister.”
“Then act like, and in the words of Rose, ‘Man up and grow a pair.’” Bella told me firmly.
“Not. Talking. To. Him. About. It.”
Bella smirked. “We'll see,” she raised an eyebrow at me and I rolled my eyes in response.
My brother cleared his throat from a few feet away, “We need to take pictures?”
“It's called closure. I saw the way you to looked at each other. It's. Not. Over.” Bella whispered before turning her pearly whites on to me. “Yes, we do.”
“Oh trust me it is!” I hissed. Bella didn’t respond, instead she merely flipped me off. I scowled knowing that was Bella’s way of saying ‘shut the fuck up I’m right you’re wrong’, I stood to her left and tried my hardest to smile.
“Geez Alice, can you fake it any harder?” Emmett teased, Rosalie snorting at her husband’s comment.
“I never fake it Em, I leave that to my two best girls here,” I patted Bella and Rosalie‘s arms, making Bella look at me in shock and Rosalie laugh.
“Whore don't you give away my secrets.” Rosalie quipped, still laughing. I glanced over at Jasper who was looking at the ground smiling. Damn I did not mean to boost that man-whore’s ego.
“Okay I lied, we've all faked it.” I lied while laughing.
Rosalie quickly turned her eyes to Jasper, “Burn!”
“I never,” Bella stuttered towards Edward, blushing.
“Please...Bella, just because he's standing here doesn't make it true. I know you faked it with Edward at least once just like I did with Jasper.” Bella shook her head vigorously at Edward. Fucking liar, she totally spilled last night.
Jasper leaned towards me behind my brothers back. “Well I know it wasn't fake on your seventeenth birthday,” he said quietly.
“How do you know that?” I asked, he smirked at me before he lifted his hand and wiggled his fingers at me.
“Oh. My. God.” I heard Rosalie say behind me.
I felt my jaw slacken as I realized what he was talking about. “Jasper!” I hissed.
“Alice!” he hissed back playfully, in a rather girly sounding voice. I noticed that everyone around us seemed to be smirking at each other. What the fuck is going on?
“Man oh man... We haven't all been together since... When?” Emmett asked, his laugh booming off the surrounding mountains.
“Men in Tights!” Bella and Rosalie squealed, laughing quickly afterwards.
*~*~*~*February 14th 2004*~*~*~*
“Get your ass down here Alice!” I heard Rosalie’s voice call from downstairs. Today was my seventeenth birthday, and frankly, I didn’t really feel like celebrating.
Not that I was sick, or that I was unpopular, or anything along those lines. Just, four years ago I had my first kiss with Jasper, three years ago my first make-out with him, two years ago he took me to a concert and gave me my second hickey. Then last year, we didn’t kiss at all until we became friends with benefits about four months ago.
Yes, I was having sex with my best friend, who I was completely in love with, and all I ever felt like I would be to him is a nice pair of legs and tits. So today, instead of trying to hang out with him - which would most likely end up with me either on top of, under, or in some other position with him buried inside of me - I decided I was going to stay in bed.
“Don’t make us come up there!” Rosalie yelled once again. I sighed, giving up as I threw the blanket off my head and began trudging down the stairs, my blanket still in hand, til I reached the bottom of the stairs to glare at one of my best friends. “Ew, Alice, did you at least brush your teeth?”
I scowled at her, “Yes, I brushed my teeth.”
She grinned at me. “Good!” she exclaimed, grabbing my hand and dragging me down to the basement TV room. Once we were halfway down the stairs Rosalie let go of my hand and ran over to Emmett’s lap, sitting quickly and peppering his face with kisses.
Gag me.
I continued down the stairs noticing that everyone, save for one person, was sitting in couples. Angela and Ben were sitting together, leaning against the sectional sofa; Emmett and Rosalie were in one corner, making out, while my brother was leaning against Bella’s legs gently massaging her foot.
There were a few more couples around, but I didn’t really care, because the minute my eyes left Bella I saw him. Jasper, and he was looking at me, but he didn’t make any effort to move. I looked him over to see if there was anything evident that I could tease him about, but his Ghostbusters tee-shirt and jeans combo left nothing open. So instead I made my way over to him, stepping over people as I went and then plopped down on top of him, making him release an ‘oof,’ on impact.
“Oh yay, you brought a blanket.” He teased as he grabbed me and the blanket all in one arm.
“It's so I can sleep if I choose to.”
“Are you feeling okay?” he asked, looking worried and putting his wrist against my forehead.
“I'm fine N.B.,” I told him quietly.
He wrapped both his arms around me, under the blanket. “You‘re sure?”
I sighed happily; saddest thing in the world is that being in his arms feels so right, no matter what kind of mood I am in it always cheers me up. “Yeah, just thinking a lot.” I told him.
“Care to share?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at me.
I shrugged, “It doesn't seem like my birthday should be a big deal…”
“Of course it is. We all celebrate the day you were brought into the world.” He placed a kiss on the top of my head, “I for one, am very grateful that you're here.”
“Only ‘cause of my tits and legs,” I mumbled.
“No Alice, not just for that. I care about you and you're my best friend. Those things are just perks?” he said in the form of a question, I didn’t nod or shake my head. Instead I studied his face, trying to see if he had any feelings he was hiding from me. No such luck. I decided to get a little more comfortable, moving myself around Jasper’s side and curling a leg and an arm around him while resting my head on his shoulder. “Happy birthday Ali Cat,” he pulled me closer.
“Thanks N.B.,” I whispered. “At least Rose hasn't thought of a way to get us locked up in a closet to make out or something.” I mused.
“No, but if you're feeling up to it I have a plan for us later.” I could hear the smile in his voice as I felt him adjust just as I looked up to see him prop his head up on his arm.
“What kinds of plans?”
“Just something special for my someone special,” he told me in a sing-song voice. AH! He thinks I’m his someone special. I buried my face in his chest to hide the grin that there was no way in hell I could hide. “Like I said if you want,” I felt his fingers slid up under the side of my shirt, grazing the skin of my ribcage with his fingertips.
“Yes. I mean... yeah, it's cool with me.” World’s biggest idiot, table of one.
The corner of his mouth turned up into a smile as he told me, “It’s a date then.” A date. A real fucking date with Jasper Whitlock. I did everything in my power not to squeal out-loud, but my entire body was shaking with excitement. Fuck yes, motherfucking fuck yes. I heard Jasper chuckle at my reaction bringing me back down a little. Jesus Alice, why can’t you act more mature?
Jasper and I continued to cuddle under my blanket, mainly because I was wearing a short and tank combo and was freezing my ass off and also because it gave Jasper some coverage as he touched me. His fingers running lightly across my thigh, my arm, my side. It seemed as though he couldn’t help but touch me, like stopping would be next to impossible.
The first movie Rosalie put in was Princess Bride, knowing it was among my favorites - mainly because Jasper likes to whisper all of Westley’s lines into my ear while the movie is playing. He continued his little tradition, whispering so lovingly into my ear, and even though I knew it wasn’t true, the things he was saying, it was nice to imagine him loving me.
After that Rosalie put in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, which in the end we were all laughing at. Then came the horror flicks, not my personal fave, but I didn’t complain. Well, at least until they tried to play Gothica. Jasper hates that movie and I could feel him tense up next to me, so I used my veto power to override everyone wanting to watch it.
After that we watched Men in Tights; a classic amongst our group of friends, we all sat together, repeating the lines. Everyone except Jasper that is. I wondered for a minute what exactly he was doing until I felt his fingers slide between the elastic of my shorts and the skin of my ass. His hand continued its journey south and I thought he was just going to knead my ass until, “Oh.” I gasped, everyone looked over at me and I felt my face get extremely hot.
“Sorry I just told her about something I discovered in my bio lab,” he lied, very obviously trying not to laugh at my embarrassment. The explanation worked though because they went back to watching the movie. I reached over and pinched his nipple through his shirt, making him laugh and say, “Ow,” all at the same time.
“Warn me before you stick your finger in my twat.” I hissed quietly at him.
He began pulling his finger out, “Do you want me to stop?” he asked, thrusting it back deep inside of me. I buried my face into his neck to hide the moan.
“No.”
I felt a kiss on my ear. “Didn't think so.” he said pumping his finger in and out of me furiously as I pinched his nipple again, this time twisting and making him growl.
“Shut up N.B., you know you like it.” I told him; before I moved my mouth to his neck, sucking and biting down to help keep my own sounds quiet and virtually non-existent as he slowly teased my core, bringing me closer to the edge.
He continued pumping his fingers into me as he grabbed my hand and put it on his bulging crotch to make me rub up and down his length a few times then leaving my hand to make its own pace. I looked up at his face, he was biting his lip hard and his half-lidded eyes glazed over. He began matching my pace and inserted a second finger, making it really hard for me not to groan.
We continued our slow steady movements, trying not to catch the attention of the rest of the group, but to be honest doing this, and the fact we could get caught only made it that much hotter. I picked up speed which made him pump into me faster, I was biting my lip and pushing my hips back onto him, feeling the pleasure begin to cloud my judgment, my thoughts, and my mind. Until it exploded, making my body tense and stop, his fingers deep inside me as I flat-lined for a minute.
Holy fucking Christ I love orgasms. I opened my eyes and looked up to see Jasper smirking oh so seductively at me before pulling his hand away from my crotch and sucking on the fingers that were in me a few moments before.
He smirked at me as he said, “Surprise.”
I giggled, “Was that supposed to be my birthday present?” I asked in a hushed tone.
“One of several,” he informed me before kissing me quickly and quietly.
“N.B.…” I purred, curling up closer to his side. Half of me held out the misguided hope that Jasper would want me to be his girlfriend as he cuddled me back. After all we did act like a couple, so maybe this was a step in the right direction, maybe he would want more with me.
After the movie was finished Rosalie informed both my parents and I that I was spending the night with her and Bella since Charlie was going to be out of town and then they left. I looked at them oddly and then just shrugged. I loved spending time with them so it really didn’t make a difference to me. Once they were gone Jasper began talking to my parents, he was standing very straight and his arms were locked at the hands behind his back so I knew it was best not to interrupt what looked like an important conversation. Then he came back to me, “Esme and Carlisle say it’s okay for me to take you on a date.”
We went to his house first where he ran in to get a picnic basket, sleeping bags, cooler, and long rectangular, silver and pink wrapped box. He began driving once again, the direction we were going I knew we were headed towards the Kalaloch beach. A beach we didn’t go to often, but they had campgrounds and it was close enough to Forks that it wasn’t a big deal to go there but far enough away that we didn’t have to worry about people showing up.
Once we got to a campground he began setting things up, while I sat on the hitch of the SUV, curled up in one of the thermal blankets he kept in the back watching him. He set up a fire, and poured soup into a pot to heat over it, then he used the lid of the cast iron pot as a griddle and made grilled cheese sandwiches.
I don’t know what I am so amazed about, he was a boy scout after all.
Once he was finished he grabbed the cooler, the picnic basket, and my hand and led me over by the fire, serving me dinner first then serving himself. We spent the whole time smiling occasionally at each other as we ate. I was bouncing a little in happiness; any guy can take you out to a dinner and a movie as a first date. Jasper made me dinner and took me to the beach.
Once we were finished eating, Jasper cleaned up the plates and everything and returned them to their place in a hidden compartment in his SUV. Then he cleared his throat and opened the cooler, handing me a glass bottle with red liquid inside. “Strawberry daiquiri… trying to get me drunk N.B.?” I asked as I took a sip off of my drink.
He gave me a wry smile, “Maybe.”
“You don't have to get me drunk to get laid you know,” I teased, nudging him and smiling.
“I know, but seeing as it's your seventeenth birthday,” he shrugged. “I figured you'd like a daiquiri.”
I snickered, “Thanks N.B.”
“You're welcome,” he stated. I didn’t know what else to say so I just chewed my lip and took another pull off my drink. Focusing on the ocean as the sun went down beyond the horizon until I heard him clear his throat. “So I've been thinking... you know about us, and I was wondering if you wanted to be my girlfriend?” I looked over at him shocked to see he was chewing his lip rather nervously.
“Say that again?” I whispered, afraid I’d imagined what he had said.
He looked over at me rather nervously. “Do you want to be my girlfriend?”
“Is that why you were trying to get me drunk?”
He laughed nervously. “Yeah, ‘cause I mean I know I'm not the best looking guy or whatever but... Yeah.”
Did he actually think that? Looking back on it and all his actions the past few months while we were messing around it certainly seemed that way. I scooted closer to him, “I think you're the best looking guy I've ever seen.” I placed a gentle kiss on the corner of his mouth. “Are you sure you want little ol' me to be your girlfriend?” I asked, biting my lip in anticipation.
“The best things come in little packages Ali Cat,” he informed me giving me a shy smile.
“I've always wanted to be your girl, Jasper.” I whispered, afraid that my voice would give me away.
“Really? You always wanted the nerd huh?”
I shook my head; I couldn’t believe how low he thought of himself. Jasper was sexier than fuck and smart as hell. “I've always wanted you.” I told him. He must’ve liked my logic because he quickly moved closer to me and pressed his lips urgently to mine, a quick and desperate peck that left me wanting more. “So... I'm your girlfriend... as in…”
“As in... date nights... flowers, cheesy love notes…” he smirked as I grinned so hard I could swear my face was going to break. “And other things.” Fuck yes. I grinned even harder and kissed him hard. “So is that a yes?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at me.
“Yes,” I nodded.
“Okay then…” He grabbed my hand and laced his fingers with mine before gently tugging me closer to him and kissing me, letting his tongue slip between my parted lips and playing with mine.
We continued to kiss like that for a few minutes, neither of us really moving to make the kiss hotter or pulling away to make it tamer. “Jasper?” I mumbled against his lips, making him pull away slightly.
“Yes, Alice?”
“Can I say something without you freaking out... 'cause it's a really cold night to be left here all alone.” He raised an eyebrow but didn’t open his mouth to say anything, instead he just nodded. “I love you.” I mumbled.
“We'll see if you still feel that way in a week,” he teased, smiling gently down at me.
I raised an eyebrow at him, “What?”
He shrugged, “I might be bad at this whole boyfriend thing…” he pulled me into his lap.
“N.B.... you sure you wanna be my boyfriend?” I asked, wrapping my arms around his neck.
He tilted his head to look up at me, “Why do you doubt that I do?”
“'Cause... I mean…” I let out a heavy sigh, “You have college girls and they're prettier, more mature, more... everything.” I shrugged. “And I'm just Alice.”
“I think you're more than they will ever be Ali Cat.” I looked down at the small space between us and shrugged, I wish. He lifted my chin to look into my eyes before I could wallow too much. “I want you Alice. Please don't doubt that.”
“I want you too…” I whispered.
“You sure?” He looked at me speculatively.
“How can you doubt it?”
“You seem hesitant, almost… scared?” His eyebrows furrowed.
“You never wanted me before Jasper... I just don't want to get hurt,” I explained, putting my heart out there a little more.
“I have... I just…” He shrugged, like it was supposed to answer all the questions of the universe.
I chewed my lip, should I demand that he explain? “Can I have my presents now?” I asked instead.
He nodded, “You may have one now.”
“Which one?”
“The box I know you were eyeballin' the whole way here,” he said in a steady voice. Yes! I squealed a little and clapped my hands excitedly; Jasper always gets me what I want. He smiled at me. “Are you gonna let me up to get it?” he asked, making me wiggled quickly off his lap so he could. He laughed as he got up and ran to the SUV, getting the present from the back seat, then coming back and handing it to me, settling down in the sand so he was next to me again. “I hope you like it,” he said. I carefully unwrapped it and pulled up the lid of the box, revealing a pretty pale blue sweater with butterflies embroidered on it, it was the sweater I wanted last week at the mall. I hugged it and kissed his cheek, making him smile. “I know you said you wanted it,” he said.
“Thank you N.B.. You're so good to me.”
“Flattery will get you everywhere Ali Cat,” he mused, smirking at me and making me giggle.
“When do I get my next gift?” I asked, knowing already what that gift was going to be, and as slutty as it sounds I was excited for it.
“Depends... You ready for bed?” he asked, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.
I shook my head to say no then said, “Yes.” Just to tease him a little.
He grabbed my hoodie and pulled me back onto his lap. “Or we can wait a little and watch the stars…”
“We can't do both?” I asked, wrapping my arms around his neck once again.
“Yes we can,” he smirked.
I grinned back at him, “I want that then.”
He peppered my lips with kisses, saying, ‘as you wish’, in between each one. Then he did something he had never done with me before, he gently ran his lips against mine, a caress with his lips. I felt the love, urgent and unbridled, but still calm and patient, like he could kiss me like that forever.
I heard the sound of the zipper, then felt the cool air nip at my arms as he took my hoodie off before pulling me flush with his body and probed deeper into my mouth. I used my hands to unzip and push off his hoodie.
He pulled away, “Hold that thought,” he told me before he pushed me off his lap and ran over and fixed up the sleeping bag, which looked like two that were zipped together, and unzipped one side. He came back over to me and after taking my hand walked me back. We sat in the center of the folded back sleeping bag and continued kissing and stripping each other of our clothing.
That was the first time we made love.
remember to check the time line for the story!
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